Posted by: Joan Spiller | December 21, 2010

Christmas Cake – Recipe

So I realised it’s Xmas time nearly, thought I’d better make a cake so I made this last night and typed up the recipe as I went, enjoy!

1c sugar                                                            
3T Lemon juice 
4c flour
1 tsp baking powder                                   
4 large eggs
1 c water             
1 tsp salt
1 bottle tequila
cup brown sugar 
2 cups dried fruit

1st: Sample the tequila to check the quality.
Take a large bowl, check the tequila again to be sure it is of the  highest quality.


Turn on the electric  mixer.
Beat one cup of  butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add 1 tsp of sugar. Beat again

At this point I find it is best  to make sure  the tequila is still ok. Have a quick slug.

Maybe (in the interests of being diligent) try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy.

Break 2 eegs  and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick  the fruit up of the floor .

Mix of the turner.

If the fried truit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the tequila to test  for  tonsisticity.

Next,shift 2 cups of salt or somefing .

Check the twiquela.Now swift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table.Add a spoon of sugar or somefink.Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finnally, after finding the twequeela finish it off throw the oven out the window followed by the bowel  and wipe the bench with the cat.




  1. Got a headache just reading the instructions. Thank we will pass on this one!


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