Posted by: Joan Spiller | December 25, 2013

Christmas passed


As I type this, it’s 7.30pm Xmas day. I’ve just poured myself a glass of bubbles to commemorate the day (and cos I wanted one!) It’s been a funny day, hideously windy but sunny and I’ve been very productive.

1st I slept in til 6am, then did the animal chores .. Not really chores – I love how the chooks (and bloody roosters, 3 so far … sigh) come running when I call them. PURE cupboard love, it’s still cute.

The goat boys are similar, although I suspect they actually do like me not just as a food source since they can DIY in their paddock. There is something rather lovely about walking towards 3 very excited creatures leaping and calling out with delight and hope, anytime you approach them!

Breakfast for the cats and dogs was a little special (canned crap – I don’t give it to them often but they love it lol) for Xmas and then it was my turn..

Home made pesto on whole grain toast, rubbed with garlic and topped with ripe tomatoes + olive oil.. all washed down with strong hot coffee. Delish!

About this time I sent a few texts to people I care about .. wishing them a fun day before sitting to watch “Driving Miss Daisy”, cute movie. Next I walked the dogs, mowed the lawns (am just topping them every few days, since they were done by my lovely wwoofer Benjamin) but it still takes over an hour .. watered the roses, tomatoes, herbs, orchard, sunflowers and passion-fruit plants.

I then had a shower before going out to walk the dogs again – this time at the beach .. always a fun thing to do and – since it is not a helluva nice day, I was alone as we walked, so had tons of time to think..

Christmas as a child is such a fun, exciting time. (As it should be!) Christmas as an adult tends to be stressful, expensive, tiring, and stressful (yes, it rates a double mention!)

I know that, for the most part – my memories of Xmas as a child are fond..

Way too many presents .. lots of food .. treats that were only allowed but once a year –  such as fizzy drinks, lollies and other wicked treats. It was awesome!

As I got older I appreciated the pressures it placed on the adults among us and I am unsure now if that knowledge makes me love or loathe the whole thing..

Added to which .. anyone who knows me, knows that I took a bit of a dislike to Xmas ever since my Mother died shortly before Christmas a few years ago.

A raft of unpleasant things took place shortly thereafter but the main xmas issue for me is that she utterly adored this time of year and so it is that so many memories of what was once fun are now tangled up with other painful emotions and memories.

However, as time passes .. I’m learning that 25 Dec is just one of 365 days each year and so – as I went about my day here – I perhaps finally accepted that and set to enjoying the simple things of my day.

So while there’s a hint of sadness to each thing that makes me go “oh Mum would have loved that .. ” – as with all the things I feel since she died .. I’m now finding I can now go “well, this wasn’t so bad” (or – maybe she can see and is happy I am enjoying this) and that’s a good thing ~ time clearly healing old wounds.

Which brings me to Xmas past .. or passed, as is the case.

Whilst I would love nothing more than to delight in Xmas and be surrounded by loved ones .. family & friends – today I spent it alone with my pests and it was .. alright..

Enough of this melancholy.  I hope your Xmas passed nicely, too – Merry everything!

Roll on 2014 and .. Whatever it may hold.

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Responses

  1. This did bring a tear to my eye JS. I like that you have done your own thing and don’t feel the pressure of having to conform, although I think there is a little bit of you that would like to have a traditional Christmas!!!
    You are right about Christmas when we are kids but I do think now we have to make our Christmas’s special in our own way without worrying about the pressure of everyone around us.
    Looking forward to spending New Years Day with you and celebrating 2014….

    Like

    • Looking fwd to it too .. and yeah .. I would love to do the traditional thing – am lucky I had so many thru my life pre Mum’s death and who knows what may come in the future .. am sure it will happen again in some format 🙂

      Like


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